Anko Meets a Taurus
by Shadowlocke Prime
Summary: What happens when a half-bull, half-man creature comes tearing through the Elemental Countries, then through Konoha? What happens when it meets Anko? Trouble, that's what! But for who? Konoha? The creature? The Elemental Countries? Or Anko? Find out!


Okay, for anybody who doesn't know what a Taurus is, it's a mythical creature with the naked body of a man and the head of a bull. They prey on woman and rape them, due to the fact that there aren't any females of their species. Now, if you don't know what a nymphomaniac is, it's a person who either lives, craves or is crazy for sex. I'd say this word describes Anko pretty damn well. Due to this, I came up with this funny scenario.

Anko Meets a Taurus

Reports have been coming in from all across the Elemental Nations. No one knows what the creature is, but all females (and shinobi, especially the kunoichi) have been told to be on the lookout for a large, naked man with a bulls head. They've been warned that it was dangerous and vicious – in other words, savage. It had last been reported seen heading toward Konohagakure no Sato.

Currently, one Mitarashi Anko is sitting at her favorite restaurant, eating Dango and having a pleasant conversation with her best friends Yuuhi Kurenai and Inuzuka Hana about their love lives.

"-and I said, 'If I find THOSE books around here again, you'll wish I'd thrown you in with my dogs'."

The three girls laugh.

"You should have seen his face. He was like 'Kakashi left that book here, I don't read those things'."

The girls laugh again, Anko and Kurenai shaking their heads.

"I still can't believe you're dating Iruka." Kurenai says.

"I second that." says Anko.

"Me? What about you and Ibiki?" responds Hana.

"That?" asks Anko with a laugh. "Oh we just screw around for fun."

"Literally." her two friends mutter simultaneously.

A roar interrupts their conversation. Screams a few block away from them draw their attention.

"Damn! I didn't even get to finish my Dango!"

"Forget your Dango Anko. That sounds like civilians."

Kurenai and Hana run in the direction of the screams. Anko glares at her plate of Dango, then races after her two friends. Turning the corner, they come upon the scene of several ANBU and a scarred man trying to restrain some sort of creature. The girls stare in shock and amazement for a few seconds before snapping back to attention.

"Hey Ibiki! Need any help there?" Anko shouts at the scarred man.

The Jonnin turns to face the three. Several emotions flash through his eyes – shock, pain and relief – before he nods.

"Okay ANBU, I think we can get it from here." Hana shouts at the masked guardians of Konoha.

The ANBU quickly clear the area. It''s then that Anko, Kurenai and Hana get a good look at the creature. It's about seven feet tall, with a bulls head. From the shoulders down, it has a mans body – and it's completely naked. It's feet are bulls hoofs, and it has shaggy fur covering it's shoulders, from it's elbows to it's wrists and from it's knees to it's ankles. But what Anko spots... is it's 'tackle'.

Hana and Kurenai give Anko an odd look when she starts drooling.

"Anko? Are you okay?" Hana asks.

"Fuck! Look at his inguinal! I bet he's a real dog in bed!"

Hana and Kurenai cover their eyes, shaking their heads.

"ANKO! Is sex all you think about?" Kurenai shouts.

Anko grins as she looks at them.

"Never mind... don't answer that." Kurenai mutters.

A roar draws their attention back to the creature. Anko grins evilly, then jumps at the creature. It turns and runs. Ibiki (who had been standing off to the side watching the entire thing) stares in shock as the creature runs in the direction of the Training Ground 44 – or the Mori no Shi1. Kurenai and Hana laugh loudly.

"It seems even that monster has instincts that tell it to run from Anko." Hana says, shaking her her head.

"Come on, we better follow them and make sure they don't destroy Konoha..."

The three Jonnin follow the sex-driven woman and monster through the village, cleaning up the mess the two create. They eventually find the two in the stadium, where Anko has the creature trapped. The creature is backed against the wall, with Anko approaching it with an evil smirk. The thing is looking around, as if trying to find away out. Kurenai, Hana and Ibiki sit down in the stands, grinning. Kurenai pulls a scroll out of her pocket and unseals something.

"Pocky?"

She offers some to Hana and Ibiki. The two shrug and accept her offer, Ibiki taking the Capachino flavored and Hana taking the Chocolate. Kurenai takes the Blue Raspberry Icee, then seals the rest of the Pocky. A nudge from Hana gets Kurenai's attention.

"Hmmm?"

"I hear Jiriaya in that tree." Hana says, pointing to a tree not to far from them.

"Leave him. Maybe he'll get caught in Anko and that _things_ way." Kurenai says, smirking.

Hana nods, then turns her attention back to Anko and the creature. By now, she's already jumped it. It's roaring, scrabbling around and trying to get away as she molests it. Ibiki shakes his head, smiling.

"Damn thing shoulda run for the gates. It's not getting away until she's good and done." he says.

~Taurus's POV~

{This woman is fucking crazy! That's it! No more woman for me. For now on, I'm strictly doing guys.}

~End Taurus's POV~

FIN

A/N Okay, I know that story was short, but please forgive me for that. And please forgive me for the crappy ending. Please note, Taurus's are extremely stupid, so none of them would be intelligent enough to think that... I just decided to make this one a little smarter.

1Mori no Shi translates as Forest of Death. Also, in Japan, the last names are prononced first – just thought I'd let people know.


End file.
